HOW TO LET GO AND LET LIVE

HOW TO LET GO AND LET LIVE

HOW TO LET GO AND LET LIVE

In life, if people insist on only fulfilling specific roles, at certain moments, who are you to change them?

Seeking complete satisfaction from one person is a demanding ordeal and not really fair.

Don’t get me wrong: there’s no need to settle for something you’re unhappy with, but perhaps learning to be content with the reality of each instance will help keep you pleased more often. If you continue to focus on what’s lacking, you’ll fail to notice what’s readily available.

Either way, what one person is not willing to provide, someone else will. That’s the way of the world…

Just because you’re not open enough to spot opportunities, doesn’t mean they’re not there!

Attract everything you need by staying real and living truthfully.

By grace, the Universe will give, but you need the freedom and awareness to know when gratitude must be granted.

With love as the power and purity of your existence, keep your energy in line with what you want, let the world reveal itself, and consciously welcome the goodness of your desires manifested.

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MASTER TIME TO MASTER YOUR LIFE

MASTER TIME TO MASTER YOUR LIFE

At times, our hearts are hindered by hopes of past dreams: those moments of broken will and lost light.

We mustn’t let darkness deter the chance for a future of change and truth.

With whatever failure you face, always remember to keep your head high and look forward.

HERE’S HOW:

THE MISTAKES YOU MIGHT BE MAKING…WHAT COULD THEY BE?

BUCKLE DOWN AND SHAPE UP! KICK OFF A PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT PLAN FOR A NEW YOU! START TODAY! THE TIME IS NOW!

MASTER TIME AND MASTER YOUR LIFE! MAKE EVERY MOMENT MATTER!

 

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HOW WILL YOU FACE TODAY?

BE PROUD, STAY PRODUCTIVE, AND SEE TRUE SELF!

 

Challenge Yourself!

Series: “Accepting Our Appearance”

Challenge Yourself!

I’m concluding this series with these links…enjoy!

8 Ways to Practice Self Love

Inspirational Quotes of Strength

10 Self‑Affirmations for Daily Confidence

The Ultimate Guide to Happiness

How to be Content

 

final challenge post

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A Comparison to See: Watching the Documentaries Thin and Baby Faced Body Builders

Series: “Accepting Our Appearance”

A Comparison to See: Watching the Documentaries Thin and Baby Faced Body Builders

 

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LET’S THINK…

WHAT DETERMINES OR THREATENS OUR SELF‑IMAGE?

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Gender differences create socially‑accepted gender norms. The Barbie and Ken type of beauty, with men being fit and muscular and women being pretty and skinny, is prevalent in Westernized culture.

In fulfilling certain models of beauty, both men and women are at risk of living by the standards of their appearance. Men can develop manorexia, as they desire to resemble model mannequins or they can develop bigorexia, where they’re obsessed with their muscles and lifting weights because they are never satisfied with how “big” or “ripped” they are. Women tend to be preoccupied with being skinny, which highlights the notoriety of anorexia or bulimia.

When we become obsessed with our bodies, we control our appearance by either minimizing our weight or by overcompensating for what we feel is lacking. Of course, we should be aware of what we consume, how we treat our bodies, and what motivates our self‑image; however, if our body‑image becomes our self‑image, gauging how we see and value life, then there’s a problem.

The documentary Thin is filmed in a Florida clinic and follows women diagnosed with eating disorders.

The documentary Baby Faced Body Builders is filmed in the United Kingdom and follows three teenagers who live to bulk up their muscles.

Both of these documentaries present a behind‑the‑scenes look into the reality of disordered logic and restrictive habits. Many of the films’ participants confess what made their appearance a central part of their lives, along with why or why not they see their lifestyle as dysfunctional.

We have the right to live as we choose, but it’s important to note how maladaptive thinking and behaviors affect our quality of life.

We are all unique. We deserve to be appreciated for our differences. Our self‑image should not be valued by how well we can replicate imposed archetypes of perfection.

We must be honest and learn to look out for ourselves. If we know we’re doing something wrong, we should do what we can to restore order. When we face our fears, we can conquer our weaknesses.

Don’t be a victim of vanity. Value who you are.

Your life is in your hands…be kind and take care of yourself.

best friend

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Book Review: Wasted

Series: “Accepting Our Appearance”

Book Review: Wasted

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LET’S THINK…

IF YOU COULD CREATE A BOOK ABOUT YOUR LIFE’S STORY, WHAT KIND OF BOOK WOULD IT BE? DO YOU THINK YOUR BOOK COULD HELP PEOPLE?

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Self‑development begins with the desire to better ourselves. We must monitor our behavior, check out thoughts, forgive ourselves, and seek enlightenment.

 The quest for self acceptance is life long: the journey can be bitter and full of decay or a practice of patience and compassion.

 Wasted book

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The memoir Wasted is written by Marya Hornbacher. The book documents a period from adolescence into early adulthood. Marya details her affliction with hunger, drugs, sex, and body‑image. She describes multiple bouts of intensive therapy, along with her being hospitalized and institutionalized.

The story is disturbingly truthful and raw; it permits an inside look of being plagued by dysfunctional thinking. Marya’s self‑destructive lifestyle pushes her to neglect the world, for the sake of her appearance; her familial, social, and occupational ties are severely affected, causing her to lose touch with reality. Through artistically crafted prose, Wasted exemplifies the complexity of deprivation, discipline, and conditioning.   The story recognizes how limitations and failure create an insatiable dissatisfaction of the self. Similarly, the book touches on the hazards of perfectionism, the perils of an overly‑competitive mindset, and the plight of manipulation.

We must be courageous enough to tell our own story…our lives can help others, just as others can help our lives.

be yourself

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The Interview: A Voice to be Heard

Series: “Accepting Our Appearance”

The Interview: A Voice to be Heard

 

When our self‑concept is distorted, it can be fixed.

If we assess our level of functioning, regarding our quality of life and happiness, we can modify behavior by realizing a need for change.

For some, this “fixing” and “change” are taken to an extreme.

To provide an authentic account of those who struggle to accept their appearance, the following interview is between me and a young girl from a ProAna forum, where anorexia is promoted as a lifestyle. Within the Eating Disorder Community, there’s a special lingo members use to communicate.

I didn’t want her to feel threatened or judged, I simply wanted to hear her experience; throughout the interview, I use the lingo to help her feel more comfortable.

I hope, through this genuine perspective, we learn more about ourselves.

Be aware, empathize, learn, and grow.

We can either acknowledge our issues or remain in denial.

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I transcribed the information included in her profile, translating some of her ProAna abbreviations, for clarity’s sake.

Ethnicity: Native American

Highest Weight (HW): 150lbs.

Current Weight (CW): 131.8lbs.

Goal Weight 1 (GW1): 130lbs.

Goal Weight 2 (GW2): 110lbs.

Ultimate Goal Weight 1 (UGW1): 100lbs.

Ultimate Goal Weight 2 (UGW2): 95lbs.

The interview took place over the phone on Tuesday March 5, 2013 at 7:47 pm.

            START INTERVIEW

  • Me: When did you start to embrace ProAna?
  • A: Nine years old.
  • Me: What triggered your interest?
  • A: Well, it was really my own curiosity. I started to check out some of the information online and it kind of sucked me in. There was also this one time my dad called me fat. I will never forget that! I guess, in that way, it was kind of my parents too.
  • Me: Do your parents know you’re ProAna?
  • A: Oh no…no one does.
  • Me: You’ve never told anyone?
  • A: I have one friend who knows, but she’s not ProAna. I talk to this other girl who’s ProAna; it’s only texting though…we’ve never met in real life.
  • Me: In all these years, no one’s been able to detect you’re ProAna?
  • A: Nope…no one. Everyone’s clueless! I guess I’m pretty good at hiding it…after all these years…
  • Me: Do you engage in regular exercise?
  • A: Of course!
  • Me: Are you only ProAna or are you ProMia too?
  • A: I’m both.
  • Me: Do you identify with one more than the other?
  • A: No, they’re both pretty equal.
  • Me: So you practice ED rituals, like fasting, along with binging and purging?
  • A: Yep. I fast about one to two days a week.
  • Me: How do your habits affect your body?
  • A: I actually have a lot of health issues…my stomach is torn apart from the vomiting…and laxatives. I get sick a lot. I guess I’m just kind of weak.
  • Me: Do you practice self‑harm?
  • A: No, not anymore.
  • Me: What did you do?
  • A: I use to burn myself.
  • Me: Did you do it as a way to release emotional tension or as a punishment for eating?
  • A: I would say it was a mixture of the two.
  • Me: Would you say you’re suicidal?
  • A: Oh no! Not at all!
  • Me: Have you experienced any kind of trauma? Or were you ever bullied or taunted about your weight?
  • A: No…it was more of an internal thing. You hear this voice in your head that tells you, “you can’t do it…you will always be fat!” I guess you just do what you can to keep it quiet.
  • Me: So, would you say you hate yourself or you hate the food? In all this, who’s the true enemy?
  • A: Ummm, I would say the food. The food is the enemy. If it wasn’t for the food, there wouldn’t be a problem.
  • Me: How do you see yourself, from one to ten?
  • A: A two.
  • Me: What do you like about yourself? Really, it can be anything…at least one…?
  • A: If I had to say, it would be my eyes.
  • Me: Okay. What do you dislike?
  • A: Everything else!
  • Me: Where do you receive the most pressure to be thin?
  • A: Society…definitely! I will never fit in…I’ll never meet up to the standards of what it takes to fit in.
  • Me: Who is your ideal thinspiration?
  • A: Miley Cyrus.
  • Me: Are you proud you’re ProAna?
  • A: No…no, no, no. Really. Over the years, it’s been like an on‑again off‑again kind of thing. I’ll see what I’m doing and just think it’s so stupid! Then I have those moments where I’m called back. Once you’re in, you’re in for good…unless you really get help…like real help.
  • Me: Have you ever been to treatment?
  • A: No, but I probably will. Eventually…
  • Me: So, you don’t see being ProAna as a lifestyle, you see it as a sickness?
  • A: I mean, I know it’s bad! Obviously! But really, it’s like this battle between good and evil. You want to be happy with yourself, but Ana says you won’t be, unless you lose more weight. Every time you do, it’s just never good enough. You always have to keep going…
  • Me: How do you feel Ana has affected your life?
  • A: Ehhh, it’s alright. I’m okay with it; it doesn’t take too much from me.
  • Me: Overall, are you happy with life?
  • A: Sometimes. Most of the time, I’m just depressed.
  • Me: Could you imagine living this way, for the rest of your life?
  • A: Yeah…it wouldn’t be that hard.
  • Me: Would you rather live a long, healthy life or die young, but skinny?
  • A: Young and skinny! Definitely…
  • Me: If you knew someone who wanted to be ProAna, what would you tell them?
  • A: I would tell them it’s a bad idea. You won’t be happy because you’ll never be pleased with yourself. You will feel scared, alone, sad, and will always have bad feelings that will never, ever, go away. You will always have a low self‑esteem. Always…
  • Me: Do you want help, so you can stop living ProAna?
  • A: I do and I don’t. I’m sick of feeling like this and I’m sick of living in secrecy. At the same time, this is all I know. To think of living any other way is just scary…it seems impossible. The way I live, is what I know…it’s familiar. Ana is the only way.

 

END INTERVIEW

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